So I’ve been in hospital this week so I wanted to say something about hospital staff as hosts – I hadn’t really appreciated before how important they are as hosts and I’ve learned a lot of dos and don’ts from observing them and thinking, as I lie still, healing.
The first thing that I really got is how much difference a host makes when you are in an unfamiliar and unpredictable environment – the reception staff that put me in the system were administrators not hosts and it made me very uneasy as they were just asking me questions an telling me where to go and what to do.
However, once I got to the operating the theatre I was greeted by nursing staff who were definitely amazing hosts. Their job is very specific – to keep people safe and also to keep them as comfortable as possible – I love this job spec – to me this is the essence of hosting!
The first thing that I noticed is how they interacted with each other – they were very positive with lots of laughter – this made a huge difference to my comfort level – just seeing how comfortable they were and how they seemed at home in such an intimidating space made me instantly relax.
The next thing I noticed was how direct they were with me – asking me direct feeling questions and if I was comfortable straight of the bat as well as very quickly giving me a “space” – they showed me to a bed, and said “This will be your recovery space”. This one act of giving me a space of my own had a huge effect – all of a sudden the place seemed less scary and more hopeful.
When I went into the operating theatre there were some really hard core nurses in there with specialist training – one thing I noticed (I was conscious for my whole surgery) was that these two seemed even better hosts than the ward staff.
They were asking me very, very often how I was feeling and if I was okay, and once I was settled they made a few jokes to lighten the mood. They encouraged me to talk throughout the entire procedure, which I did.
Then something amazing happened. I was having surgery where they burn your heart. They can’t give much pain relief as it stuffs up the operation so its very painful. As the surgeon started burning and the pain set in, one of the nurses touched my brow and started gently patting it and just talking to me quietly, saying “Are you okay, your doing well, be brave…” etc, in a quiet, low voice; and wow, what a difference it made – it kept me so calm and helped me keep still for the surgeons.
This went on for 5 hours – she never let up the whole time – just encouraging during the tough bits and making jokes in the less stressful bits.
What was really brought home to me was the infinite power of touch. That light hand, gently resting on my forehead. Who would think that such a little action could make such a big difference.
Ill never forget this experience as long as I live and it’s a massive reminder for me that being a host is a skill that can always be improved, and that the lessons in how to make THE difference for another person in need are all around us if we open ourselves up and drink it in!
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